Her oncologist described her case of cancer as aggressive, but they had caught it very early. All test results showed that she did not have cancer in any other part of her body. However, to be safe, they decided to proceed with chemotherapy to make sure that the cancer cells do not spread anywhere else. She did her first round of chemo a few weeks ago and goes in for her second cycle on this coming Friday.
Her hair started falling out this past week and that has been very difficult for my mom. I think you could have given her 2 months to live and she would be less disappointed than the fact that her hair is falling out. She's going to cut it really short tonight.
It's hard to see your parents go through hard things because your parents are the strong ones that help you through hard times. It sucks for all of this to be going on in Alaska and I'm down in Utah. I won't even get to see my family until Christmas time. It sucks to feel helpless, but not helpless in the sense that I need help, helpless in the sense that I can't do anything to help my mom. I'm unable to give help sort of helpless?
Something that has really bugged me in the past few days is how people react to people that are going through situations like mine. Granted, it's really freakin hard to know what to say to someone when they tell you that their mom has cancer. However, I have decided that in times like these, it is very important to not think about yourself. I feel like a lot of people around me are handling the situation in a way that they feel most comfortable and not even stopping for a second to think about how I would want to be treated in this situation. I'm a very private person, I always have been and always will be. When I feel like talking about something than I'll tell you my whole friggin' life story. But if I don't feel like talking about my mom having cancer, no matter how much better YOU would feel if we talked about it, than I don't feel like talking about it and you should just back off.
Now, I totally get that people want me to know that they care, so understand that in the right time and place, if you want to show compassion and ask, "hey how's your mom doing?" then I promise, if I feel like talking about it I'll tell you everything, but if I don't feel like talking about it than I'm not going to and you shouldn't push the issue. But I think the key to all of this is the right time and place. Example: trying to talk to me about my mom having cancer in the middle of a party, DEFINITELY not the right time or place. Privately at church, DEFINITELY could go either way depending on the day. At my home with only close friends around, DEFINITELY okay...doesn't mean I'll feel like talking about it, but I could accept that as a reasonable setting.
Understand that I'm mainly just venting. And if nothing else all I really want for you to take from this is, just think about the other person. It's not about what makes you feel more comfortable in the situation. If we're trying to be Christ-like, and I mean really truly Christ-like, than shouldn't we focus on the person going through the hard time and what their needs are?
I sound very bitter right now, haha, I don't mean to be, but I started this blog so that I could be uncandid (or whatever that word is) in whatever I am feeling. And this is truly how I feel.