The Corners of My Heart

I promise, someday I'll get back to some of the other reasons I started this blog, but the Spiritual Health side of my life has just been in the forefront of my mind. It seems that's the way it is when we are going through big changes.

During the 7 Days of Easter, I went looking for this talk, but came across this one along the way. If you don't want to read or listen to it, he talks about how there is a lot of bad in the world, but we have the power to leave that bad behind (for the most part). The talk is entitled, "Place No More for the Enemy of My Soul." The title alone fills me with such power and strength.

One of the reasons I chose to teach in the Health Science field was because I wanted teenagers to understand that their quality of life came down to their choices. A lot of times in high school, I felt like some of my friends got drunk and performed other harmful behaviors was because they felt like that was what they were supposed to do--we were teenagers, that's what the world expected of us. Because I had been raised to not drink or sleep around, I realized I had a choice in the matter. I chose not to do those things.

The other day at church, this lady was teaching the Sunday School lesson and she talked about how she (and all of us) hold on to certain rebellions and tuck them away into the deep corners of our hearts. We're unwilling to sacrifice them, even though we know the happiness of righteousness will bring so much greater joy than any rebellious act could. Some people may scoff at the words 'rebellion' or 'sin', thinking that they don't correlate with happiness. However, in my life, I've always seen a direct correlation between the choices I made and my happiness. I've never had to deal with the misery that is associated with addictions or the heartache and stress that comes from deciding to terminate an unwanted pregnancy. I'm not saying anyone is a bad person because of these acts or that I'm a better person because I haven't dealt with them. I'm just saying that sometimes, as adults, we forget that the choices we make do have  an affect on our happiness.

The teacher's comment made me think about what I have tucked away in the corners of my heart. What am I unwilling to give up--despite the happiness that would come by doing so. Sometimes, we preach and preach about certain aspects of life, but we really need to take a deeper look at what's happening in our own. What's stopping us from achieving our maximum level of happiness?

I came across this graphic on Facebook today, and I loved it's simplicity. Happiness and positivity really can be quite simple to achieve, but what choices are we willing to make to achieve them?

What's been happenin' / Menu 4/1

You may have noticed, I haven't been doing Weekly Goals lately. This move has really taken the wind out of my sails. I've had the hardest time getting a routine going that I like and can stick to. The thought of having weekly goals has become too much (sad, but true). Lately we've been taking it one day at a time. Sometimes, that's just the way life goes.

To make matters worse, J has been sick since last Thursday. Since I am passionate about not letting my kid go to public places where other kids will be when she is sick, I haven't been to the gym since last Thursday either. Basically, I've been a hormonal nut job without my much needed endorphins. Last night I went totally loco on K. When I freaked out over nothing, I thought, "Where did that come from?" Do you ever have those out-of-body-arguments where you know the entire time that you are wrong and have absolutely no idea why you're continuing on in your quest for right-ness? Yep, that was last night. So tonight, as a peace offering, I'm going to admit my wrong and go to the gym. That sort of seems like a backwards peace offering, but K will understand and accept it gladly. That's what we call "a peace offering on a budget!"

While my life may be crazy everywhere else, I have loved still putting up our weekly menus. It makes me feel like I still have my life together...even if it is only in one small area! It really is all about the little things!

Ham sliders

Baked Creamy Chicken Taquitos 

I'm excited about this one!

Twice Baked Potatoes
Remember a few months ago when I said I was going to do this. Yeah, I never did. I did find this new recipe, though. So, hopefully, I'll be giving this a try at some point this week.

Tostadas
-Hard shell corn tortilla, refried beans, lettuce, salsa, cheese, sour cream, green sauce, other stuff. Sometimes we throw nacho cheese on it if we're feeling up to it.

Beef Noodle Casserole

Tilapia marinated in Sun-Dried Tomato dressing, on George Formen, with cheese melted on top, and random spices thrown over it. Basically I loved this recipe and will recreate it with what I have on hand.

Pizza Night
The local grocery store here has a pretty decent generic pizza dough. You can't beat an entire pizza for $3.00!

Arrows pointed out

I have a list of topics I want to write about and discuss with all two of my readers :), but today none of them were really speaking to me (the topics, not the readers). I didn't feel passionately enough about any of them to make them even sort of worth reading. I was perusing Facebook when one of my friends posted a link to this article review. I'll be honest, I still haven't even read the original article, but it reminded me of an observation I have made in recent months.

When I was single, I thought I wasn't selfish. Then I got married. When I got married I realized how selfish I really was as a single person. When I got married, I thought I wasn't selfish. Then I became a mom. When I became a mom I realized how selfish I really was when it had just been K and I. 

I'm no saint, but I can say without a doubt that marriage and becoming a mom have made me into a much better person than I would have been had I not made those life altering decisions. Obviously, people can be kind and thoughtful without being married or becoming a parent. However, the kind of consideration for others it takes to be even remotely good at being a spouse and parent is not something that can be learned in any other capacity. 

Growing up, my mom always had a saying, "Keep your arrows pointing out." It was the visual I always needed, especially as a kid, to remember to think about others. If your arrows are pointing in, you want all the attention to be on you, you are only thinking of yourself, and you don't understand why others aren't doing the same. 

While it is still easy to have your arrows pointed in as a spouse, there is no way you can do that as a mom. When that tiny little human being turns from "the sea monkey on the ultrasound" to a real live human with wants and needs, the time for perpetual 'arrows pointing in' is gone...forever! I've always been an extremely competitive person--I like to be good at whatever I do. One reason I became a stay at home mom (SAHM) was because I realized very quickly there was no way I could be good at being a teacher and be good at being a mom all at the same time. I'm not saying others can't, I'm just saying I couldn't. If I was doing a great job at being a teacher, that meant I was not doing all that I needed to for J at home. If I was doing a great job at being a mom, I was not giving all that I needed to my students. I couldn't take that kind of failure! I chose to be a SAHM and it has made the biggest difference in my life, my husbands, and my daughters. People look down on it (to be honest, I used to look down on it), but until you feel that little baby in your arms and the weight of their every need is placed on you and your spouse's shoulders, you'll never understand the decision I've made. Being a SAHM has made all the difference in my life and my desire to become a better person. I will never understand society's need to tear down those that want to be a mom and have a family, but for whatever reason, it is there. 

I can't decide how to end this post, but I can provide you with the best graphics I have ever made during nap time.

No:

Yes:

You're welcome.

PS: So *EVERYONE* will stop asking me to show them pictures of what it looks like when J wakes up before I've finished my post.